it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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