we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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