Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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