The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
