We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
