ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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