I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
