so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize