do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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