don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
What a dumb baby whore.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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