I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Send us your Text From Last Night!
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
