Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
