I murdered the dance floor call the cops
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Just pee around me
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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