she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
