hotel room ftw
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
