That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
