just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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