Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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