This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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