I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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