i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
