she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
