sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
