Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize