How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
