some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
