Where is the hickey?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
