your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
