just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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