Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Semen is not good for contacts.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
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