He is such a slut. More and more my type.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
