help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
