now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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