try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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