Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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