That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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