Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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