he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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