Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
