Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You were trust falling into bushes
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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