And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Randomize
