My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Randomize
