Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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