if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
