I cannot find my penis.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
