the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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