this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
