the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
