8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize