Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
